Tag Archives: yoda

The Real Truth Behind Who Rey’s Parents Are In Star Wars The Force Awakens

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Warning this is a groundbreaking, earth shattering, Star Wars spoilers. It’s about the new Disney ones. Stop reading now if you don’t want your world to be rocked and your mind to be blown…

I have uncovered the parentage of Rey, and it’s so obvi that you’ll kick yourself for not realising earlier. Rey is amazingly strong in the force. As in heaps better than anyone else. She can take on and beat Ren who has been extensively trained by not only Luke but also in the dark side, let’s presume by Stimpy. Regardless, he’s mega, super, awesomely, trained. Rey still beat Ren without training, people with training would struggle against him but she beat Ben… I mean Ren…. yeah, best code name ever Ben, I can imagine how it came about as some petty argument with his parents. Don’t call me Ben, my name is now, ummm, errrr, Ren, yeah, Ren, that’s totally different, so don’t call me Ben anymore. Regardless of how stupid his name change is, Rey beat a trained Skywalker who already has a history of two powerful Jedis (and one Sith), which means she needs to come from a lineage even more powerful than the Skywalkers. So I present to you the proud parents of Rey- Maz Kanata and Yoda.

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Search your heart, you know it to be true.

Yoda is without a doubt the most powerful Jedi in the history of time, in the history of ever. Maz Kanata, although not Jedi trained is hyper force sensitive. She’s like 1000 and doesn’t look a day over 300, the force is strong in that one for sure. So how did this happen?  Maz Kanata clearly has a thing for Chewie, quite simply, he’s just not that into her and Yoda is grass cutter. One night after one too many rejections from Chewie, Maz Kanata turned to Yoda and said, “I guess you’ll do.” When at 900 years old not so fussy you will be. So he took the pity relationship. And then something about an uber long gestational period… possibly caused by the magnitude of the force requiring extra incubation. And then there is the obvious family resemblance. Merge Yoda and Maz together and you totes get Rey. Totes.

Glad I could solve the mystery of Rey’s parentage for you. You’re welcome Earth and the rest of the universe.

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Stuff My Kids Need For Christmas Because I Want It!

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You know what, kids aren’t going to remember what you got them for Christmas when they’re little so you may as well get them stuff you want… or at least that’s what I’m telling myself.
I’m a little bit obsessed with those GOOD / BAD Parenting signs so when I saw this I laughed… I laughed, and then I laughed some more. Love it!

If loving Gumby is wrong then I don’t want to be right. Quietly confident my kids dig Gumby despite not knowing anything about it.

Because sauce isn’t messy enough with a three year old I have to add a challenge. An awesome challenge. Behold the sauce ray gun.

Pretty sure this slightly creepy toy won’t give any of my children nightmares. I’ll put it on the list for one of my sons. I love it and I wants it. My precious.

My daughter is almost 3 now. High time she started looking after her own finances right?

My boys might not be one yet but they eat a lot. I have to say my daughter’s eating has improved no end since they started crawling because she knows if she leaves food hanging about then they’ll get it. What could be better for a couple of hungry lads than a lunchbox? I love this panda! So hilarious.

My favourite bath toys as a kid were a set of brilliant stacking ducks. Therefore my children…

I’m quietly confident that my love of sci fi has rubbed off on my kids and they need a jumbo rocket… and if they don’t like it I’m sure my husband will find the top of it interesting to look at.

And of course they’ll need appropriate bedding to match their rocket.

Anything can happen when they’re asleep,  I do have three kids after all so I better get them these for bed time too.

Shut the front gate! I can’t believe there are Arabian building blocks! Finally I can build the castles I want to build… I mean finally my kids can build the structures they want… They’re very architecturally savy amongst the three and under set.

You would not believe how much my kids love Final Fantasy!

Since my boys heard that there was a scene where Luke wears Yoda like a backpack and Yoda whisperers words of wisdom into Luke’s ears, my eleven month olds have not shut up about how much they want to carry around a yoda on their back.

And weirdly my kids want a pretty dress in my size. I guess they’ll grow into it.

…. I do have three kids…
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